One hazard of thinking

Philosophy is insanely ambitious. "To think the whole," indeed!

Sometimes a rush of analogies occurs to one in a downpour. It's as if some clinamen in the rain of ideas suddenly causes a congealing. Get it all down, as quick as possible! But the hand is clumsy, and the mind, that mercurial omnivore, dances further and further ahead. Wait, mind, wait!

This rush can be exhilarating -- until it's not. The slightest admixture of ego is enough to unbalance one. But the ego is a sly thing, and you don't notice -- or rather, you collude with yourself in "not" noticing, and the rush of excitement builds. And then, you take a moment, and realize, my God I'm out of my depth. Suddenly the sweet self-congratulation turns brittle and bitter. "I'll never get this all down, I'll never make it hang together."

All this is far easier to avoid in dialogue. It's another reason why thinking by oneself is dangerous for beginners like me.